Valentines Day

All posts in the Valentines Day category

Funny Valentine’s Day Quotes

Published February 15, 2012 by LoveGurus

All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.

Charles M. Schulz

Today is Valentine’s Day – or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day!

Jay Leno

I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known.

Walt Disney

I want a man who’s kind and understanding. Is that too much to ask of a millionaire?

Zsa Zsa Gabor

If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question?

Lily Tomlin

I’m dating a woman now who, evidently, is unaware of it.

Garry Shandling

We’ll love you just the way you are if you’re perfect.

Alanis Morissette

True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked.

Erich Segal

Look, there’s no metaphysics on earth like chocolates.

Fernando Pessoa

Before I met my husband, I’d never fallen in love. I’d stepped in it a few times.

Rita Rudner

Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.

Groucho Marx

Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.

Albert Einstein

Money can’t buy love, but it improves your bargaining position.

Christopher Marlowe

We don’t believe in rheumatism and true love until after the first attack.

Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach

What the world really needs is more love and less paper work.

Pearl Bailey

In a recent Valentine’s Day posting on her fan website, Britney Spears says that – oh, who cares?

Amy Poehler

The last time I saw him he was walking down lover’s lane holding his own hand.

Fred Allen

It’s better to have loved and lost than to have to do forty pounds of laundry a week.

Laurence J. Peter

I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks.

Steve Martin

The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he is a baby.

Natalie Wood

The better I get to know men, the more I find myself loving dogs.

Charles de Gaulle

Husbands are like fires – they go out when they’re left unattended.

Cher

A Valentine for Someone I Hate « Life in the Boomer Lane

Published February 14, 2012 by LoveGurus

To the person who spelled my middle name incorrectly on my birth certificate: I applaud you for your creative license.  You took a strange spelling and turned it into an even stranger spelling. You recognized that although I was merely minutes old, I strove to be unique.

To my first grade teacher who looked at my deranged, curly hair and asked me “Doesn’t your mother ever comb your hair?”:  Yes, bitch, she did.  Whoops, I thank you for caring enough about my personal grooming to have said something.

To the doctor who said, “It’s fun getting your tonsils out.  You can eat all the ice cream you want afterward.”:  I thank you for this. Although swallowing ice cream right after the surgery was the equivalent of swallowing sandpaper with nails embedded in it, I was able to eat it and enjoy it in vast quantities by the following day. And, thanks to your permission, I have continued to do exactly that for the 55 years that have followed.

To my sixth grade teacher, who had me spend day after day transferring her knitting patterns onto graph paper:  To this day, the sight of tiny x’s gives me an anxiety attack. But the permanent lipstick on your teeth has taught me the importance of blotting. I thank you for that.

To the girl in junior high who used to sit across from me in the lunchroom, whose dirty overly-long nails would sink into her white bread sandwich:  I thank you for impressing upon me the importance of both keeping my nails clean and avoiding white bread.

To the one who accepted my invitation to my senior prom, waited until I had purchased tickets, then told me he couldn’t go with me. I thank you for notifying me before my dress was purchased.  And, if you are reading this now, know that I did get my money refunded for the tickets.  I’m sure you have worried about this over the years.

To the boy who chased me around a bed in college: I later learned that being chased around a bed could, indeed, be tons of fun.  Just not with you.

To the woman in the coat department who refused to sell the 30-year-old me a coat until I brought my mother in:  I was upset with you then.  I wish I could hug you now.

To the person who, on the day I joined a gym, said, “Gyms make money from people like you.  They join and then never go.”:  I thank you. Because of that one remark, I committed to proving you wrong. I have been going to the gym regularly for 36 years now, still proving you wrong.

HAPPY VALENTINES DAY, Dearest Buttheads.  I wouldn’t be the Me I am today without you.

3 loving but inexpensive Valentine gifts

Published February 13, 2011 by LoveGurus

1. Time in a bottle: Give your hardworking spouse a full day to do whatever he or she wants — or just to relax — no interruptions allowed. For him, that means he gets to engage in his hobby, watch the game, play 18 holes or do absolutely nothing. For her, that might means you feed and entertain the kids while she indulges in a good book, a bubble bath or a manicure. Announce your gift — along with your most heartfelt message of love and appreciation — in your best handwriting or play with various fonts on your home computer. Clean up an old wine bottle and insert the rolled-up message tied with a red bow.

2. Dining out: Sure, you can take your loved one out to dinner, but that can get expensive. Instead, eat out — as in outdoors. A picnic in a park or at the beach will fill the bill. In frostier climes, set up a picnic blanket and basket at the dining room table, on the living room floor or in the middle of that king-size bed. Add a rose or two rather than a dozen for atmosphere.

3. New adventures: Do something different. Go somewhere you’ve never been before, or “someplace you haven’t been in a while that’s special,” says John Gray, author of “Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus.” The site of your first date, for example. When you vary your routine, “that’s what creates the memory,” he says.

via 14 loving but inexpensive Valentine gifts.

Creative Valentine Dates

Published January 21, 2011 by LoveGurus

Valentine Pancakes with Maple Raspberry Sauce

Make breakfast special with these heart-shaped buttermilk pancakes topped with a sweet and easy-to-make raspberry-maple sauce. Other than tasting great, they can also be made ahead a reheated for an any-time treat.

Ingredients

Pancakes:

* 1-1/2 cups all-purpose flour

* 3 tablespoons sugar

* 2 teaspoons baking powder

* 1/2 teaspoon baking soda

* 1/2 teaspoon salt

* 1-1/3 cups buttermilk

* 1 large egg, at room temperature, lightly beaten

* 3 tablespoons butter, melted

Maple Raspberry Sauce:

* 3/4 cup seedless red raspberry jam

* 3 tablespoons maple syrup

Cooking Instructions

1. In a large bowl whisk flour, sugar, baking powder, baking soda and salt to combine.

2. Make a well in the dry ingredient. In the well add the buttermilk, egg and butter. Stir to moisten. It will not be smooth.

3. Grease and heat griddle over medium low heat. For each pancake, pour 1/4 cup of batter onto griddle Cook about 1-2 minutes, or until bubbles appear on the top of the pancakes. Turn and cook about 1-2 minutes more or until just cooked through. Repeat with remaining batter.

4. With 3-inch heart-shaped cookie cutter, cut pancakes into hearts.

5. For sauce: In medium microwavable bowl cook raspberry jam with maple syrup on high; stir to combine. Continue to heat in 30 second intervals, stirring to combine, until raspberry jam is melted

Make-Ahead

Pancakes can be made ahead, cooled, then wrapped well and frozen up to 1 month.

Tips & Tricks

Reheat frozen pancakes in toaster. Reheating them this way they will have the very thin, crunchy layer on the sides of the pancakes.

A microwave can also be used to reheat frozen pancakes. Reheating them this way the pancakes will have a uniform soft texture.

Preparation Time:

15 minutes

Ready In:

20 minutes

Servings:

4-5

Valentine Strawberry Shortcakes

Published January 21, 2011 by LoveGurus

Valentine Strawberry Shortcakes

Flaky buttermilk biscuits, rich strawberry topping, and cool whipped cream combine beautifully in this classic Valentine’s Day treat. Cutting the biscuits into heart shapes makes a memorable presentation.

Ingredients

* 2-1/2 cups all-purpose flour

* 2 teaspoons baking powder

* 1/4 teaspoon baking soda

* 1 tablespoon sugar

* 1/2 teaspoon salt

* 1/2 cup shortening, chilled

* 4 tablespoons unsalted butter, chilled and cut in small pieces

* 1 cup buttermilk

* 1 quart strawberries cut small

* 1/4 cup sugar

* 1 cup heavy cream

* 2 tablespoons sugar

* 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract

Cooking Instructions

1. Preheat oven to 450 degrees F. Lightly grease 2 cookie sheets.

2. In a large bowl whisk flour, baking powder, baking soda and salt to combine. Cut in the shortening and butter using two knives or a pastry blender until the pieces are about the size of peas. Add buttermilk and stir to blend.

3. Turn out on lightly floured board. Knead about 4 times and pat into a 3/4-inch thick rectangle. Using a 3-inch heart-shaped cutter, cut out biscuits. Cut as many biscuits as possible by reforming scraps into a 3/4-inch thick rectangle.

4. Bake about 20 minutes or until golden and baked through.

5. In a medium bowl, mix strawberries and sugar to combine. Let sit until juice forms.

6. In a large bowl with a beater on medium-high, beat cream with sugar and vanilla until whipped.

7. To serve, slice through biscuit horizontally and place cut sides up on a plate. Top with 1/4 cup berries and juice and 1/3 cup of whipped cream.

Make it Faster

Instead of using a cookie cutter, pat the dough into a rectangle and cut into serving-sized squares with a sharp knife.

Tips & Tricks

For a richer taste, brush the tops of the biscuits with beaten whole egg or heavy cream.

Preparation Time:

15 minutes

Ready In:

25 minutes

Servings:

6

Creative Valentine Dates

Published January 20, 2011 by LoveGurus

1. Send a message with an invite for an intimate dinner and include a tube of chapstick with a red ribbon around it and a note indicating that it will be needed. After the meal and some chocolate covered strawberries, hand your valentine a box with kissing impressions all over the outside in red lipstick, and filled with Hershey kisses and little pieces of paper. Search the Internet for different types of kisses – there are over 50 – and write one on each piece of paper. Take turns drawing a slip and demonstrating thekiss.

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